Dear Massimo,
Hey; I can only imagine that things are starting to get really rough for you during your second semester. Well don't complain; suck it up. It's your own fault, you're the one who decided to take all of those hard course so you could finish not one, not two, but three majors in three years. But remember why. Remember that it will help you pick up that minor in computer science you want. Remember that it will give you the edge when applying to internships Junior year. Remember that, at the end of the day, it will be what made all the difference between you and some other student. You have no excuses; lesser men have done greater things. So what are you doing? Get back out there and study. Don't count the costs and don't worry about the outcomes. If you put in the work, you will get the results.
-Massimo
Wednesday, December 9, 2015
Letter to Former Self
Hello. I'm you, but about 3 months from now at the end of your semester. I am going to be frank with you; you are not as good of a writer as you think you are. Not even close. You have a lot to learn, and the faster you decide to do it the better you will perform. FOLLOW DIRECTIONS! Just because you think you understand something does not mean you should not carefully plan it out before you write about it. Make sure you cross-check things with the prompts. Also do not get lazy. Research as much as you have to in order to effectively get a point across. Lastly, have a little fun, and also do not buy the math textbook - you do not ever use it.
-Massimo
Reflective Essay Organizing Ideas and Thesis
- Focus on a specific assignment, experience or concept:
Though I feel as if I had a firm grasp on the course as a whole, my understanding truly showed most lacking in the first assignment: quick reference guides. What I learned from this is rooted in my knowledge on what a QRG is, my ability to do a rhetorical analysis without purely summarizing, and my research skills.
2. Compare your experience writing in this course to past experiences:
This course, as compared to other past experiences, focused more on application rather than just learning, teaching me new writing skills through trial and error rather than just memorization.
3. Reflect on strengths and weaknesses:
Though I do feel like I have solid organizational skills and well-developed ideas, my writing is noticeably lacking in style, use of research, and critical analysis in regards to the writing prompt.
4. Focus on course objectives:
My ability to meet course objectives is most likely my biggest weakness, as I lack a solid focus when it comes to sticking strictly to the prompt and fulfilling required tasks. This is rooted in the little time I spend brainstorming and my tendency to not seek out peer review.
5. Focus on your writing process/self-perception as a writer:
My writing process, though many times very powerful, is plagued by tunnel vision and the inability to see my own mistakes. Though I do not think I am by any means a poor writer, I am far from a good one, and I feel this has to do with my lack of in-depth research preceding my writing and failure to search for effective peer review following it.
I feel as if my “focus on a specific assignment” is going to be the most effective because it best reflects how I see my experience in the course. Though I may have not done fantastic overall, my performance on the first essay (QRG) was definitely far below my abilities, do to simple but detrimental errors I made that looking back I now would like to avoid. Using this essay, I would like to be able to communicate with my teacher that I now understand the purpose of a QRG and know to focus more on my brainstorming of my essay before choosing a subject that may fail to fit the prompt.
Audience and Invention For My Reflective Essay
1. I want to discuss the ways in which I have changed as a writer and the awareness I have gained about some of an to implement the teachings of this course.
2. My primary audience is my professor; my secondary audience is my peers and myself.
3. They most likely believe I am a flawed writer, and that some of these flaws were exposed.
4. I will attempt to focus on my major shortcomings in certain concepts and assignments throughout the course, and how changing them could impact my writing potency.
5. The writing will very clearly show how humble I have become, and by discussing how I could change my writing for better effects they will trust I have the ability to improve my writing (and I have no reason not to use it).
2. My primary audience is my professor; my secondary audience is my peers and myself.
3. They most likely believe I am a flawed writer, and that some of these flaws were exposed.
4. I will attempt to focus on my major shortcomings in certain concepts and assignments throughout the course, and how changing them could impact my writing potency.
5. The writing will very clearly show how humble I have become, and by discussing how I could change my writing for better effects they will trust I have the ability to improve my writing (and I have no reason not to use it).
Discovering Your Writing Process
1. I consider myself to be a more scientific writer, one influenced by STEM research papers. I have good ideas and elevated diction, but sometimes it ends up convoluted.
2.Yes I have, depending on the prompt I will modify my style.
3. My approach has definitely become more clear and simple. I try to say what I want to say efficiently while still holding elevated prose. I feel as if my approaches are now less complicated and more direct to the prompt.
4. It used to be little planning and significant editing. Through the semester, the amount of time planning has increased and thus the editing has decreased. Depending on the type of essay, however, I may not plan as much for a more genuine stream of consciousness feel.
5.Yes I did. Focusing more on pre-writing activities like SOAPSTone has helped a lot and I will definitely use it in the future.
2.Yes I have, depending on the prompt I will modify my style.
3. My approach has definitely become more clear and simple. I try to say what I want to say efficiently while still holding elevated prose. I feel as if my approaches are now less complicated and more direct to the prompt.
4. It used to be little planning and significant editing. Through the semester, the amount of time planning has increased and thus the editing has decreased. Depending on the type of essay, however, I may not plan as much for a more genuine stream of consciousness feel.
5.Yes I did. Focusing more on pre-writing activities like SOAPSTone has helped a lot and I will definitely use it in the future.
Background Research For Public Argument
In the past thirty years, the United States has dropped over ten spots in the education rankings amongst OECD countries (CFR). Results from recents year’s international standard examinations shows the United states ranking outside the top ten in every category. Once prominent in each of these areas, the United States now stands at twenty-first in science, seventeenth in reading, and twenty-sixth in math (The Atlantic). Furthermore this has affected students down the road. It is becoming more and more necessary to have a college degree, with those who have at least a bachelors earning on average 40% more than those who do not, but the United States now ranks nineteenth in likelihood to complete college with respect to other OECD countries, whereas it ranked first only two decades ago (CFR, Business Insider). Overall, twenty-nine percent of American men and seventeen percent of American women had less education than their parents, compared with the OECD average of nineteen percent for men and thirteen percent for women (Business Insider). The low rankings, however, are not only seen with just the students, but the teachers as well. Sixty percent of the United States’s teachers are considered unqualified for the top five ranked OECD countries in education, the United States ranks twenty-second in teacher salary, and the ranks twenty-second in student to teacher ratio (Ericdigests Cobb, The Guardian). The United States, however, ranks fifth in education spending per student (The Atlantic). The education system is mediocre in quality yet top of the line in spending, showing inefficiency and internal inequality. In comparison to the other top twenty ranked OECD countries in education, the United States shows the highest variance in test scores between students (US News). Furthermore it has been found that a ten percent increase in minority student percentages was correlated with a seventy-five dollar decrease in per student spending. The United States education system lacks equality and quality across the board and the students continue to do worse and worse in comparison to not only other countries, but the previous years of the United States. This has shown in other areas of the United States. Though the number of business majors has increased three hundred percent over the past few decades and one in five college graduates has a degree in business, the United States has fallen from first to twelfth on the economic freedom index (NPR, Heritage). The United States stands at eighth in number of researchers per one thousand people, and seventh in terms of research and development performance (Ranking America, NSF).
In Jahl Mehta’s article on Foreign Affairs dubbed “Why American Education Fails,” he makes a causal and evaluative argument as to why United States education is in his eyes unsuccessful. With the purpose of appealing mostly to educated Americans that have an interest of stake in the American education system (i.e. students, parents, teachers). Mehta uses an overwhelming amount of sources, made up mostly of statistics about United States education and existing United States policies on education, to back up his logic and serious, yet pedantic tone in order to convey the ideal that the United States education system needs to change. The most effective part is definitely his evaluation of United States education policies, where he expertly compares them with better policies used in other countries.
John Hood’s article on the Foundation for Economic Education named “The Failure of American Public Education” makes an evaluative argument dealing mostly with the policy side of education. Much like Mehta, Hood’s argument is pointed more towards the educated audience that has an interest in education. Unlike Mehta, however, Hood is less comprehensive about the failure of the education system, with a purpose more oriented toward pointing out the failure of bureaucracy in the education system. Hood cites many existing United States policies and evaluates why they are unsuccessful, using a very informative tone.
Kaitlyn Kaminski’s article on the Huffington Post called “Has the American Education System Failed Today’s Students” contrasts greatly with Hood and Medahl’s. Though her audience is the same (perhaps a bit more student oriented because she is a student), the problem she is pointing out is much different. Rather than compare the United States to other countries or point out statistics, Kaminski evaluates the style of education and how it fails to prepare students for the real world. In an almost angry tone, she conveys her ideal on how the american education system places too much importance on testing and fails to teach practical topics in practical methods.
My argument will be more similar to Hood’s and Medahl’s in that I will stick mostly to the statistical and comparison oriented argument while still supporting the style of the education system (test-taking). My argument will be evaluative and causal. Rather than looking at policies, I will be looking almost completely at educational performance, both by students and the schools who are teaching them. It will be more of an evaluation of what makes the students and schools here so different than those in other countries. That is, why students do not perform as well (differences in how they are taught, how they study, their own importance placed on education) and what it is schools are doing that may be negatively affecting students. Expect anecdotal evidence from students and teachers across the world rather than all statistics. My argument will be oriented towards an educated audience that has an interest in public education (students, parents, teachers, policymakers) and most of my appeals will be logic based backed up by credibility from both sources and myself being a current member of the education system. The argument will be in the form of a TED talk.
Works Cited
Ericdigests-http://www.ericdigests.org/2000-3/teacher.htm
USNews-http://www.usnews.com/news/blogs/data-mine/2015/01/28/us-education-still-separate-and-unequal
Ranking America-https://rankingamerica.wordpress.com/category/education/page/2/
ForeignAffairs-https://www.foreignaffairs.com/articles/united-states/2013-04-03/why-american-education-fails
Huffinton Post-http://www.huffingtonpost.com/kaitlyn-kaminski/teens-voting_b_5207400.html
Thursday, December 3, 2015
Refugee Rhetoric
This cartoon uses humor and irony to express its views on the current events regarding the allowance of refugees into the United States. To do so, it makes a slight appeal to logic by illuminating how our country began from the acceptance of refugees (even though said logic is fallacious), as well as a pathetic appeal by emphasizing our origins as a country. To understand this cartoon, it is necessary to have knowledge of the original American settlers (refugee Puritans) as well as the modern debate over the allowance of refugees into the country. Thus, this cartoon is directed towards the more educated and current event aware public, specifically those opposing the allowance of refugees or moderate to the situation.
Thesis Statement For Rhetorical Analysis
For the rhetorical analysis of my own TED talk, the thesis will be:
"My TED Talk attempts to spread awareness of the issues within our education systems compared to more successful countries, and initiate a call for change. I argue that this was the most effective way to reach the parents and students - those that hold stakes in American education. Using overwhelming statistical support, and biographical evidence from those in various education systems, as well as my own personal quotation to convey this ideal, I appeal to the logical and credible perspectives of my audience."
Wednesday, November 18, 2015
Lightning Talk Presentation
Here is a link to my lightning talk slideshow: https://docs.google.com/a/email.arizona.edu/presentation/d/1m8oQBz_DOJRAJgA-L25Zlj3FxdDL6D0IsJcsaYNtCuw/edit?usp=sharing
Monday, November 2, 2015
Blog Post 30: Analysis of Sample Public Argument
Letter to Government Official:
The letter has a very formal yet passionate tone. This is a very intelligent decision by the author, as it is important to be very respectful and eloquent in the face of a political superior. Especially for the case of trying to persuade. The ethos of the author, however, is quite lacking. She only states that she is a University of Arizona freshman, something unlikely to establish any major credibility. Under this, she claims that the medicare budget should remain at the same amount rather than be cut. This is done by pointing out alternatives and the negative externalities from cutting spending. I would like to see a better building of credibility from her, as well as some statistical evidence to back her claims. We are dealing with numbers in money, so numbers in the solution would be effective.
The letter has a very formal yet passionate tone. This is a very intelligent decision by the author, as it is important to be very respectful and eloquent in the face of a political superior. Especially for the case of trying to persuade. The ethos of the author, however, is quite lacking. She only states that she is a University of Arizona freshman, something unlikely to establish any major credibility. Under this, she claims that the medicare budget should remain at the same amount rather than be cut. This is done by pointing out alternatives and the negative externalities from cutting spending. I would like to see a better building of credibility from her, as well as some statistical evidence to back her claims. We are dealing with numbers in money, so numbers in the solution would be effective.
Sunday, November 1, 2015
Initial Thoughts about the Audience for my Argument
Can a writing apply to everyone? Unfortunately that question cannot be answered because it is up to the reader to decide whether or not something applies to him or her. Now can a writing be created with everyone as the audience in mind? Certainly no. Was my writing? Definitely not. My writing is already immediately limited to mostly to Americans by the fact that it is on the topic of American education. Furthermore, it must narrowed to those who are stakeholders in American education. This includes students, those that students are dependent upon (parents, guardians, friends), those involved in the american education system (teachers, deans, etc.), and those involved in the american political system (policymakers that can affect education). To many, especially those already in the education system, this may be quite hostile, as it is attacking their livelihood and practice. To those who are students and some of the policymakers, this may be motivation for a solution. My audience will most likely not need to know too much, as I will be explaining as much as possible. This, however, may change as I write more of my argument.
My Proposed Public Argument
I have always admired public speaking. But not just public speaking per say, but public speaking that is trying to convey something of meaning and importance. That is why I did speech and debate in high school, and why I gave the graduation speech at the end of my four years. So from the get go when I heard about this project, I knew I wanted to give a speech of some kind. Though I do not always agree with TED and the talks that they give, I do admire the style in which they do them. And that is why I think I will give mine in a youtube video, TED talk style. And now for the actual important part, what I would like to do it on.
Seeing as how I have spent almost my entire life in the American education system and now find myself a freshman at a somewhat average state-funded university, I have decided to make my argument a statement on public education. Moreover, it will be an analysis of the current state of American public education and what its flaws are when compared to countries more successful in that area. The purpose will be to spread awareness of what the problems are and a call to action for a solution, aimed mostly at students, parents of students, and those involved in the american education system as well as the american political system.
Seeing as how I have spent almost my entire life in the American education system and now find myself a freshman at a somewhat average state-funded university, I have decided to make my argument a statement on public education. Moreover, it will be an analysis of the current state of American public education and what its flaws are when compared to countries more successful in that area. The purpose will be to spread awareness of what the problems are and a call to action for a solution, aimed mostly at students, parents of students, and those involved in the american education system as well as the american political system.
Reflection of Rhetorical Analysis Unit
As compared with many of my previous works, this paper had a significant impact upon me. Rhetorical analysis and most of introductory English seems to be characterized so predominantly by structure. Five paragraph this, three main ideas that. And while the structure of an essay is quite important, many times it appears to be forgotten that with rigid structure comes rigid transitioning. An essay needs to be able to ebb and flow as well as follow a set path. I feel as if this essay did a fantastic job of trying to express that idea. By steering away from the conventional ethos, pathos, logos paragraph structure, it allowed the essay to carry a more streamlined feel to it. In the previous essay, the ideas that it conveyed felt so choppy and disconnected, it the essay appeared to jump from one area to the next. This essay certainly performed better in that aspect. If I could have, perhaps I would have researched more for the essay. Though I do feel that looking at the HONY website alone should and did suffice, it definitely would have been beneficial to look at outside analysis for further information.
Disregarding the essay itself, I still learned at lot from the actual Humans of New York. I am not immune to the effects I described it to carry in my analysis. Humans of New York certainly taught me more about the diversity among me and furthermore the power that pictures and social media can hold. And after seeing how powerful of an argument one can make, I am quite excited to make one of my own in the next essay - the public argument.
Seeking Help For My Draft
With my first draft in the books, I quickly looked for help, as I know my papers to be a bit wordy and ramble on. Rather than just small issues with my writing, these are bad habits that I have been long trying to break, but unfortunately am more often than not plagued by tunnel-vision. Thus, I had my good friend Kazi take a look. His analysis was not quite as detailed as I would have liked, but he did help cut down on unnecessary words. He also gave me some good ideas on how to explain the compliment between the stories and the pictures. Though this improved my essay, I will definitely still be looking for more peer review.
HONY Thesis and Preliminary Outline
Hello all (or just Dr. Bell, not sure who actually reads this). For my Humans of New York essay, the thesis I decided on was ”In his photo blog, Brandon Stanton effectively conveys the idea of diversity within unity through his genuine yet playful backstory, his photographic techniques, and the stories which accompany each photo." and the outline can be found here.
Pre-Writing Activities for HONY
Sometimes it feels as if planning is even more difficult that the actual writing of an essay. And quite right too. Of course writing an essay would be difficult without some sort of idea, just as trying to get to London would be difficult without a map. But if you take time to carefully structure and outline what you want to do, well then the writing will flow of your fingers. Luckily for me, some of this planning had already been completed. My essay is to be centered around Humans of New York, and looking a couple posts back it can be seen that some of the track have already been laid down for me. Due to a previous assignment, a SOAPSTONE and observations/inferences chart had already been completed. All that was left for me was to find a direction I wanted to take and outline it, which can be found here. Now all that is left is to write.
Personal Response: HONY
For my topic I chose the photographic blog Humans of New York. I did this due to a small passion I hold for photography, but further more a somewhat vested interest in what HONY has to say. Something I have always found intriguing is the way in which people connect. I believe that empathy is not only one of the most important things in humanity, but one of the most complex. In many ways it is what sets humans apart from the rest of life on Earth. HONY attempts to play upon those strings, and that is why I think further analysis of it would be exciting for me.
Saturday, October 10, 2015
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